How Communication with a Trusted Medium helped me Navigate my Grief

The Universe is wider than our views of it ~ Henry David Thoreau

My hope is that as you read about my personal experiences, of connecting with my loved ones through a medium after they died, that you can for a moment set aside any preconceived notions you might have about how this life and death thing works.

My wish is that anyone who has known the pain of losing someone they love, might have the chance to experience the same peace of mind I received upon having confirmation that my lost loved ones were safe and had moved on to another spiritual realm.


As you suspend your beliefs for just a few moments, I ask that you allow your mind to be open to the vast realm of possibilities. You may find that your concept of God and the universe begins to expand and some of the mysteries about life and death may be revealed to you.

As Shakespeare so wisely said, ‘There are more things in heaven and earth than are dreamt of in your philosophy.’


When my husband died in 2006, my life was turned upside down. Steve was young, healthy and vibrant when he died at age 45. I couldn’t imagine life without him.

Steve and me wedding

Steve and me at our wedding in January of 2003


Steve and I had only been married three years when he died. We had each brought three adolescent aged children to our blended family and added one beautiful daughter of our own.  We had seven children under one roof. Life was chaotic and we were very busy, but we were also incredibly happy.

On March 28, 2006, Steve was working out of town. He was doing something he loved, flying airplanes. Two hours after we last talked, his airplane crashed in bad weather in the mountains. He died instantly.

How could Steve be gone? He had so much living left to do, and so many people who needed him.

His death was not only a source of excruciating pain, but also a source of great confusion for me. I couldn’t comprehend how someone so dynamic, someone who exuded life out of every pore, could suddenly be gone.

How could he just disappear? And where did he go?

I understood that his body was gone, but I still felt his spirit. And, I was receiving signs that he was still with our family.

I was determined to discover answers about what happened to him after he died. I began to question all of the structured beliefs about life, death, the universe and God, that I had established before the death of my husband.

All of the questions I had about death lead me to deeper, and more complex, questions about the meaning of life. I began reading and researching any information I could find about life after death.

What I ultimately discovered is that death will forever change the way you look at Life.

I came to a point where I no longer wanted to observe life through the same confining and narrow lens that I had viewed life through before death entered my world.

I became willing to open my mind to the possibility that life was not as simple as I had previously believed.



Through the Looking Glass; My Experience with a Medium

At the time of my husband’s death, I had no experience with psychics or mediums. If someone had told me then, that a pair of dirty socks would prove to me that there is no death and that my husband lived on, I wouldn’t have believed them.

Six months after Steve died, a friend whose husband had also died, called me and told me that she had talked with a medium by the name of Moriah Rhame. My friend’s family, who lived up in Iowa, had urged her to talk with Moriah, as she was a very well known medium and trusted for her abilities.

While Moriah was doing the reading to connect my friend to her husband, my husband, popped into her reading and asked her to give me the message that he wanted to talk to me.

What? My dead husband wanted to talk to me?

I was caught off guard, as I really had never thought about communicating with a medium before. But, to hear that my husband wanted to talk to me was too great a temptation to deny.

I was suffering terribly without my husband. I hadn’t moved on at all in the six months since he’d died. I still had all of his clothing and personal items in exactly the same place they were when he died, as if any day he would come walking back through the door, ready to resume life as the head and heart of our family.

Steve had a habit of leaving his dress socks hanging from his dress shoes in the closet, so that he could reuse them a second day. shoes and socksThis is how they were when he died, and six months later this is how they remained. They were the first thing I saw when I walked into my closet.

When I called Moriah, she asked me no questions, she just immediately started talking to me about what she was seeing and information she was receiving. She told me this guy that was in front of her was funny (Steve was hilarious) and she went on to accurately, physically describe him. There were times she was talking to me and then she would start talking to him. I wasn’t sure what was happening.

But, just a few minutes into the conversation, what she said to me, made me catch my breath.

Moriah asked me, “Why is he laughing and telling me something about socks?” At the mention of socks, I immediately sat up and paid very close attention. No one knew that I still had Steve’s dirty socks hanging in our closet, not even my family or closest friends.

Moriah continued, “He’s laughing and telling me that he can’t believe you saved his dirty socks and it’s a good thing he didn’t leave his dirty underwear out or you would have saved those too!” I was speechless. That is exactly what Steve would have said to me.

At that moment I knew that Moriah was communicating with my late husband.

Steve’s personality survived death. He was still loving, funny and a complete smart ass. Just as in our physical life, he still cracked jokes and made me laugh when I was talking to him through Moriah.

Steve was worried about my health. He warned me that I had to take better care of myself or I would get sick. Moriah told me that he said he was going to be sending me a white flower to remind me of his love.

Just a few weeks later, I had an episode of internal bleeding (I was on anticoagulants and experienced complications) and I was hospitalized for several days and required multiple transfusions.

Steve’s parents sent me a dozen multi-colored roses. Two of them were white.

Within a week every rose had died but one white rose, which remained as beautiful as it was the first day I received it….. for THREE WEEKS.


The white flower that Steve told me he would be sending me. It lived three weeks


Honestly, I had so many amazing experiences talking with Steve through Moriah that it’s hard to limit the story to just a few. I am currently writing a book and will include more of my experiences with Moriah within the book.

The last experience I will share is when Steve played matchmaker.

Around one year after Steve died he started saying that he didn’t want me to be alone, he thought I was too young. He told Moriah and me that I had another soul mate out there (What the heck?). Steve never failed to surprise me, even after death.

Moriah started describing that Steve was showing her the symbol for the ‘scales and balances’ (we thought that had something with the legal system). She then said she was seeing Washington, and that I would have a relationship with this guy over the internet.

Well, that was all good, but we had absolutely no idea what to do with this information. Who was this guy? And how was I supposed to find him? We didn’t have a clue. But, that didn’t stop Steve. Every time I talked with Moriah, he reminded us that we needed to find this guy.

Several months later Moriah got a feeling that I was supposed to go on to find this guy. I hadn’t done any dating, real life, or internet, but I decided what could it hurt? I signed up for eHarmony that day.

That same day I was matched up with several potential suitors. I was drawn to one of them right away. His name was Michael.

Long story short. Michael lived in Washington D.C., worked for the FBI, and was an incredible man. We went on to have a relationship on the internet. We have now been married seven years (you can imagine that I felt I had Steve’s approval to remarry because he is the one who set Michael and me up in the first place!).

me and michael 4

Michael and Me in 2008


I’m not sharing this story with you so that Moriah can be used as a matchmaker. I share it with you to make clear that there is no way that the information I received from Moriah could have been coming from any other source than Steve.

I think Steve knew about all of the future heartache that was in store for me with the impending death of my son, and all of the health complications I was going to experience, and he didn’t want me to go through it alone.

If you are wondering whether remarrying made the grieving process easier, I can tell you the answer is a resounding no. Grief doesn’t stop or go away for anyone or anything. It may hang out in the background for a while, but, there is no escaping it.

And, there is no replacing someone who meant the world to you, even if you find someone else who means the world to you.

The loss of your loved one will always leave an unfillable void in your heart.

I am blessed to have had Michael to stand by my side as I walked my grief path, but it was very hard on him to see me go through so much pain when there was really no way he could help me. Ultimately, I alone, had to do the work to get myself through my grief to a place where I was able to start to find some joy in life again.




On August 26, 2008, my son, Jordan, died of kidney failure. He had been born with a congenital kidney disease and was sick most of his life. I thought I was prepared for the inevitability that he might die young.

But, I wasn’t prepared. Not even close.heart shattered

I was devastated.

I didn’t think that anything could be harder than losing my husband, but I found out I was wrong. Losing my son caused my already broken heart to shatter.

I knew I had to talk with Jordan right away. My mother’s heart had to know that my child was ok.

Jordan and girls

Jordan with his sisters and me, one week before he died.


I called Moriah and talked with Jordan the day after he died. Moriah described for me what Jordan saw in his hospice room as he died. He had seen me, his grandmother and his sisters, all sobbing at his bedside. He said he knew that we had loved him, but until he saw the depth of our pain, he hadn’t truly understood how deep our love for him was. He made it very clear that he didn’t want us to be so sad and that he was still with us.

He also wanted Moriah to tell me that he now could have all of the Doritos and Mountain Dewdew-web (his favorite food and drink) that he desired. He was in his own little heaven and doing just fine. He was no longer in pain.

Although, I still had a long road of grief to travel to recover from the loss of my son, the relief I experienced knowing that he was safe is indescribable.



Over the last ten years, Moriah has become someone I consider a dear friend. I have great love and respect for her and so much appreciation for the gifts she has given me.

I have seen that Moriah feels she has a responsibility to use her skills as a medium to do what she can to relieve the suffering of people in grief.

Being a medium is not a job to Moriah, it is a calling for her.

Moriah is also a mother of four and does philanthropic work in her community. She is a kind, intelligent, funny, and an all around extraordinary person. She is an amazing and very trustworthy medium. I cannot express how much she helped me.

I would recommend her to anyone who is looking to make authentic contact with their lost loved one.

Moriah is the real deal.

I have asked Moriah to write a little about herself and share her thoughts on grief. Moriah’s writings are shared below.

You can find out more information about Moriah at



From: Moriah


I am a reluctant medium. I don’t believe in caftans, blue eye shadow or beads in doorways. Driving a mini van with 4 children isn’t exactly glamorous in the middle of Iowa.


Moriah Rhame-Feuerhelm

Unfortunately, I don’t have time for long fingernails and my Midwestern accent makes me sound like an extra from “Fargo.” I am however really able to communicate with people who have died. Even after 16 years of doing this I still have my doubts about how this all works. I don’t particularly care for the New Age movement and find myself shuddering at saccharine, syrupy words spewed about unicorns and rainbows. Most forms of meditation music make me long for sticking my head in an oven.

I was raised in Wisconsin and enlisted in the 13th Evacuation Hospital from Madison, Wisconsin. I left college to support Operation Desert Shield and Storm. I have had a blessed and troubled life and do my best daily to help others lose their fear of living and dying. My actions for my community, my family and circle of friends are what is important to me. I do my best every day to leave this world a better place and granted some days are better than others particularly when giving the bird to someone in traffic.

I honestly believe that we exist beyond the material realm after death regardless of religious, non religious or lack of belief. I personally feel that love will always reunite you with those you have lost. It is a bond that is unbreakable and intertwines us together.

My wish for anyone dealing with grief is to be open to the idea that you can be loved from beyond the grave and that communication is absolutely possible. You are not alone and never will be. There is no death, there is no beginning or end, and there just is the constant of unconditional love. The essence of who you are and will be in life and beyond is linked before and after death.

Sometimes we are unable to breathe because our grief is so overwhelming. We may want to go to sleep and not wake up to face the nightmare our life has become. We want to know why and we want to know how this could have ever happened. Our body cannot produce any more tears and the hollowness in our chest is a consuming well. It may feel like our brains cannot process or know anything, we do not know who we are anymore and do not care. Our body will shake, we will be numb and we cannot process anything other than sadness or loss. We may feel that we are raw, bleeding from the heart and have no idea how to move forward without the person that we love so dearly. Time does not heal loss. The heart never forgets that the most beautiful person in the world to you has been taken from life. It does not matter if it has been one day, one year or one hundred years your grief is now a part of you.
When these emotions wash over you and take you into the hopelessness and despair of death you have to ask a power greater than yourself to lift you up, whether that be nature, a god, a belief or your loved one. You have to allow those who love and care for you to grieve with you. People will say things they think will comfort you. They mean well and have absolutely no idea how you feel and how you are suffering. You are raw, you are wounded and you are empty. Don’t let well meaning words hurt you further. You are allowed to feel any emotion you want. You may hurt people with your words and your actions in the process of grief and this too is okay, nobody will hold it against you. Without the person you love so dearly you are no longer who you used to be and quite frankly you will never be that person again.
Love is what keeps you bound together with your beloved. Your souls love for your most precious keeps you alive and it is also the same thing that allows them to come to you in dreams, messages and on the wing of a breeze when you miss them. Part of you died the moment they did. That part of you now resides with your beloved.
Be skeptical, you should be, just don’t be cynical. Don’t be afraid to communicate with your beloved. Ask them for dream time visits, ask them for a simple sign or a knowing. Talk them out loud or in your head. Ask your beloved to come to you, to help your healing and to show you how to live without them. Read as many books for and against spiritual communication and educate yourself. Do what feels right. Listen to your heart. Remember those who have died and hurt you when they were here on earth want your peace. Spirits still have a sense of humor. You are linked so much more closely than you’d ever imagine. If all of this sounds ridiculous then forget ever reading it. Only you know what’s real for you. Let love be the only thing that is real, everything else is illusion.

4 thoughts on “How Communication with a Trusted Medium helped me Navigate my Grief

  1. Theresa Meyer

    Moriah, before I moved away you helped me connect with family that had passes on. Things were communicated that no one else could have ever known. You are genuine and sincere. I can never express enough how grateful I am to have met you. Thank you for your gift!


  2. Amy

    If I call to make an appointment in the morning how long before I can speak with her? I hope it isn’t too long. An idea I it’s days weeks or months?


    1. Rhonda O'Neill

      I’m not sure what Moriah’s schedule is like right now. For me, it would usually take a few weeks to get on. She’s very well known and popular. She is worth the wait. Best of luck to you.


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