The Universe is wider than our views of it ~ Henry David Thoreau
My hope is that as you read about my personal experiences, of connecting with my loved ones through a medium after they died, that you can for a moment set aside any preconceived notions you might have about how this life and death thing works.
My wish is that anyone who has known the pain of losing someone they love, might have the chance to experience the same peace of mind I received upon having confirmation that my lost loved ones were safe and had moved on to another spiritual realm.
As you suspend your beliefs for just a few moments, I ask that you allow your mind to be open to the vast realm of possibilities. You may find that your concept of God and the universe begins to expand and some of the mysteries about life and death may be revealed to you.
As Shakespeare so wisely said, ‘There are more things in heaven and earth than are dreamt of in your philosophy.’
When my husband died in 2006, my life was turned upside down. Steve was young, healthy and vibrant when he died at age 45. I couldn’t imagine life without him.
Steve and I had only been married three years when he died. We had each brought three adolescent aged children to our blended family and added one beautiful daughter of our own. We had seven children under one roof. Life was chaotic and we were very busy, but we were also incredibly happy.
On March 28, 2006, Steve was working out of town. He was doing something he loved, flying airplanes. Two hours after we last talked, his airplane crashed in bad weather in the mountains. He died instantly.
How could Steve be gone? He had so much living left to do, and so many people who needed him.
His death was not only a source of excruciating pain, but also a source of great confusion for me. I couldn’t comprehend how someone so dynamic, someone who exuded life out of every pore, could suddenly be gone.
How could he just disappear? And where did he go?
I understood that his body was gone, but I still felt his spirit. And, I was receiving signs that he was still with our family.
I was determined to discover answers about what happened to him after he died. I began to question all of the structured beliefs about life, death, the universe and God, that I had established before the death of my husband.
All of the questions I had about death lead me to deeper, and more complex, questions about the meaning of life. I began reading and researching any information I could find about life after death.
What I ultimately discovered is that death will forever change the way you look at Life.
I came to a point where I no longer wanted to observe life through the same confining and narrow lens that I had viewed life through before death entered my world.
I became willing to open my mind to the possibility that life was not as simple as I had previously believed.
Through the Looking Glass; My Experience with a Medium
At the time of my husband’s death, I had no experience with psychics or mediums. If someone had told me then, that a pair of dirty socks would prove to me that there is no death and that my husband lived on, I wouldn’t have believed them.
Six months after Steve died, a friend whose husband had also died, called me and told me that she had talked with a medium by the name of Moriah Rhame. My friend’s family, who lived up in Iowa, had urged her to talk with Moriah, as she was a very well known medium and trusted for her abilities.
While Moriah was doing the reading to connect my friend to her husband, my husband, popped into her reading and asked her to give me the message that he wanted to talk to me.
What? My dead husband wanted to talk to me?
I was caught off guard, as I really had never thought about communicating with a medium before. But, to hear that my husband wanted to talk to me was too great a temptation to deny.
I was suffering terribly without my husband. I hadn’t moved on at all in the six months since he’d died. I still had all of his clothing and personal items in exactly the same place they were when he died, as if any day he would come walking back through the door, ready to resume life as the head and heart of our family.
Steve had a habit of leaving his dress socks hanging from his dress shoes in the closet, so that he could reuse them a second day. This is how they were when he died, and six months later this is how they remained. They were the first thing I saw when I walked into my closet.
When I called Moriah, she asked me no questions, she just immediately started talking to me about what she was seeing and information she was receiving. She told me this guy that was in front of her was funny (Steve was hilarious) and she went on to accurately, physically describe him. There were times she was talking to me and then she would start talking to him. I wasn’t sure what was happening.
But, just a few minutes into the conversation, what she said to me, made me catch my breath.
Moriah asked me, “Why is he laughing and telling me something about socks?” At the mention of socks, I immediately sat up and paid very close attention. No one knew that I still had Steve’s dirty socks hanging in our closet, not even my family or closest friends.
Moriah continued, “He’s laughing and telling me that he can’t believe you saved his dirty socks and it’s a good thing he didn’t leave his dirty underwear out or you would have saved those too!” I was speechless. That is exactly what Steve would have said to me.
At that moment I knew that Moriah was communicating with my late husband.
Steve’s personality survived death. He was still loving, funny and a complete smart ass. Just as in our physical life, he still cracked jokes and made me laugh when I was talking to him through Moriah.
Steve was worried about my health. He warned me that I had to take better care of myself or I would get sick. Moriah told me that he said he was going to be sending me a white flower to remind me of his love.
Just a few weeks later, I had an episode of internal bleeding (I was on anticoagulants and experienced complications) and I was hospitalized for several days and required multiple transfusions.
Steve’s parents sent me a dozen multi-colored roses. Two of them were white.
Within a week every rose had died but one white rose, which remained as beautiful as it was the first day I received it….. for THREE WEEKS.
Honestly, I had so many amazing experiences talking with Steve through Moriah that it’s hard to limit the story to just a few. I am currently writing a book and will include more of my experiences with Moriah within the book.
The last experience I will share is when Steve played matchmaker.
Around one year after Steve died he started saying that he didn’t want me to be alone, he thought I was too young. He told Moriah and me that I had another soul mate out there (What the heck?). Steve never failed to surprise me, even after death.
Moriah started describing that Steve was showing her the symbol for the ‘scales and balances’ (we thought that had something with the legal system). She then said she was seeing Washington, and that I would have a relationship with this guy over the internet.
Well, that was all good, but we had absolutely no idea what to do with this information. Who was this guy? And how was I supposed to find him? We didn’t have a clue. But, that didn’t stop Steve. Every time I talked with Moriah, he reminded us that we needed to find this guy.
Several months later Moriah got a feeling that I was supposed to go on eHarmony.com to find this guy. I hadn’t done any dating, real life, or internet, but I decided what could it hurt? I signed up for eHarmony that day.
That same day I was matched up with several potential suitors. I was drawn to one of them right away. His name was Michael.
Long story short. Michael lived in Washington D.C., worked for the FBI, and was an incredible man. We went on to have a relationship on the internet. We have now been married seven years (you can imagine that I felt I had Steve’s approval to remarry because he is the one who set Michael and me up in the first place!).
I’m not sharing this story with you so that Moriah can be used as a matchmaker. I share it with you to make clear that there is no way that the information I received from Moriah could have been coming from any other source than Steve.
I think Steve knew about all of the future heartache that was in store for me with the impending death of my son, and all of the health complications I was going to experience, and he didn’t want me to go through it alone.
If you are wondering whether remarrying made the grieving process easier, I can tell you the answer is a resounding no. Grief doesn’t stop or go away for anyone or anything. It may hang out in the background for a while, but, there is no escaping it.
And, there is no replacing someone who meant the world to you, even if you find someone else who means the world to you.
The loss of your loved one will always leave an unfillable void in your heart.
I am blessed to have had Michael to stand by my side as I walked my grief path, but it was very hard on him to see me go through so much pain when there was really no way he could help me. Ultimately, I alone, had to do the work to get myself through my grief to a place where I was able to start to find some joy in life again.
On August 26, 2008, my son, Jordan, died of kidney failure. He had been born with a congenital kidney disease and was sick most of his life. I thought I was prepared for the inevitability that he might die young.
But, I wasn’t prepared. Not even close.
I was devastated.
I didn’t think that anything could be harder than losing my husband, but I found out I was wrong. Losing my son caused my already broken heart to shatter.
I knew I had to talk with Jordan right away. My mother’s heart had to know that my child was ok.
I called Moriah and talked with Jordan the day after he died. Moriah described for me what Jordan saw in his hospice room as he died. He had seen me, his grandmother and his sisters, all sobbing at his bedside. He said he knew that we had loved him, but until he saw the depth of our pain, he hadn’t truly understood how deep our love for him was. He made it very clear that he didn’t want us to be so sad and that he was still with us.
He also wanted Moriah to tell me that he now could have all of the Doritos and Mountain Dew (his favorite food and drink) that he desired. He was in his own little heaven and doing just fine. He was no longer in pain.
Although, I still had a long road of grief to travel to recover from the loss of my son, the relief I experienced knowing that he was safe is indescribable.
Over the last ten years, Moriah has become someone I consider a dear friend. I have great love and respect for her and so much appreciation for the gifts she has given me.
I have seen that Moriah feels she has a responsibility to use her skills as a medium to do what she can to relieve the suffering of people in grief.
Being a medium is not a job to Moriah, it is a calling for her.
Moriah is also a mother of four and does philanthropic work in her community. She is a kind, intelligent, funny, and an all around extraordinary person. She is an amazing and very trustworthy medium. I cannot express how much she helped me.
I would recommend her to anyone who is looking to make authentic contact with their lost loved one.
Moriah is the real deal.
I have asked Moriah to write a little about herself and share her thoughts on grief. Moriah’s writings are shared below.
You can find out more information about Moriah at http://www.moriahthemedium.com.
I am a reluctant medium. I don’t believe in caftans, blue eye shadow or beads in doorways. Driving a mini van with 4 children isn’t exactly glamorous in the middle of Iowa.
Unfortunately, I don’t have time for long fingernails and my Midwestern accent makes me sound like an extra from “Fargo.” I am however really able to communicate with people who have died. Even after 16 years of doing this I still have my doubts about how this all works. I don’t particularly care for the New Age movement and find myself shuddering at saccharine, syrupy words spewed about unicorns and rainbows. Most forms of meditation music make me long for sticking my head in an oven.
I was raised in Wisconsin and enlisted in the 13th Evacuation Hospital from Madison, Wisconsin. I left college to support Operation Desert Shield and Storm. I have had a blessed and troubled life and do my best daily to help others lose their fear of living and dying. My actions for my community, my family and circle of friends are what is important to me. I do my best every day to leave this world a better place and granted some days are better than others particularly when giving the bird to someone in traffic.
My wish for anyone dealing with grief is to be open to the idea that you can be loved from beyond the grave and that communication is absolutely possible. You are not alone and never will be. There is no death, there is no beginning or end, and there just is the constant of unconditional love. The essence of who you are and will be in life and beyond is linked before and after death.